S-19 wrote: ↑Sun Dec 04, 2022 3:03 pmI haven't made up my mind yet firestarter, I typed the quote 'more hours out of range each week' as a reference to narcissistic abuse. See, I'm weighing up the balance between joining a gym and not joining one. The motivation for joining is strong for me as it would mean 'more hours out of range each week' away from narcissistic abuse.
So it's the other way as how I understood it... English isn't my first language.
I think that you have taken Felix's thread on "narcissistic abuse" too serious; it seems to have had a negative influence on your trust in people.
Most people that you have a problem with aren't narcissists. It could actually be the other way around, as narcissists in general are good talkers and fun to be around...
Despite what he suggests, and what you believe, Felix is NO expert on narcissism or how to deal with it.
That's not even counting that what may work well for him, won't work for most other people.
Firestarter wrote: ↑Sun Dec 04, 2022 8:12 pm
So it's the other way as how I understood it... English isn't my first language.
I think that you have taken Felix's thread on "narcissistic abuse" too serious; it seems to have had a negative influence on your trust in people.
Most people that you have a problem with aren't narcissists. It could actually be the other way around, as narcissists in general are good talkers and fun to be around...
Despite what he suggests, and what you believe, Felix is NO expert on narcissism or how to deal with it.
That's not even counting that what may work well for him, won't work for most other people.
*Sigh*
I wouldn't have guessed that English isn't your first language Firestarter, I'd no idea Your English is that good.
As for the rest of your post, it's like what I typed before, for anyone here who hasn't gone through this in any serious way, count your lucky stars. I'd rather not get into things too deeply on an open forum format here as it's personal, but Felix, myself and many others here have gone through (indeed, many are still going through) this mental torture, for that's what it is. And, false modesty aside, Felix, myself and others on here are very knowledgeable on the topic, putting the effort into delving deep into what is often a painful subject, and willing to make the efforts to learn and heal from this very emotionally painful experience.
Honestly Firestarter, your post above is both glib and dismissive in tone. I hope that you don't take this the wrong way, as I've found your posts to be suppostive in the past on a few occasions. However I felt the need to answer in a frank, straightforward manner, as I don't take narcissistic abuse "too serious"; I take it "extremely seriously" because I know how it can, and often does, ruin people's lives.
Indeed, just before seeing your post I was watching the video linked below, as I still like to educate myself as to the evil tactics full-blown narcissistics can employ. I'm not just throwing out words here for effect; malignant narcissists are evil people they have in effect given up on having love in their lives and are out for destruction (even their own). On the thread twenty pages+ long which Felix begun there are many fine posts wthat forumites have posted. To make your comments above about these efforts in such an offhand manner smacks of invalidation, of trivialising a dynamic that often has horrendous effects. Frankly, for me your post borders on the insulting, which is why I'm responding in this fashion. If it's surprisingly strong for you, well you might realise that I'm very passionate about this phenomenom.
Narcissistic abuse ruins lives. I propose that this is the real pandemic of modern times, blighting the lives of many millions. It deserves, no demands, to be taken very seriously indeed
Last edited by S-19 on Mon Dec 05, 2022 1:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"If you already know it is bad and do it, you commit a sin difficult to redress."
S-19 wrote: ↑Mon Dec 05, 2022 12:47 amAnd, false modesty aside, Felix, myself and others on here are very knowledgeably on the topic, putting the effort into delving deep into what is often a painful subject, and willing to make the efforts to learn and heal from this very emotionally painful experience.
You seem to overestimate your understanding of things you do not. Neither you nor Felix seem to have studied anything on psychology, and both of you do NOT understand "narcissism".
.
S-19 wrote: ↑Mon Dec 05, 2022 12:47 amAs for the rest of your post, it's like what I typed before, for anyone here who hasn't gone through this in any serious way, count your lucky stars. I'd rather not get into things too deeply on an open forum format here as it's personal, but Felix, myself and many others here have gone through (indeed, many are still going through) this mental torture, for that's what it is.
S-19 wrote: ↑Mon Dec 05, 2022 12:47 amHonestly Firestarter, your post above is both glib and dismissive in tone. I hope that you don't take this the wrong way, as I've found your posts to be suppostive in the past on a few occasions. However I felt the need to answer in a frank, straightforward manner, as I don't take narcissistic abuse "too serious"; I take it "extremely seriously" because I know how it can, and often does, ruin people's lives.
S-19 wrote: ↑Mon Dec 05, 2022 12:47 amFrankly, for me your post borders on the insulting, which is why I'm responding in this fashion. If it's surprisingly strong for you, well you might realise that I'm very passionate about this phenomenom.
Repeating yourself, creating some sort of mantra to prevent yourself from waking up
The problem now is that you're now in a mindset that is "safe", and the only way to get you out of it is making comments that you won't like. It is human nature to think about ourselves as "awake", while numbing our brain with misinformation, propaganda, drugs, alcohol, etc. Always looking away, never looking at our own actions but instead blaming others, which is the main topic of Felix's (and the other contributors) rant on "narcissism"...
Now the only way to wake people up, is tell them the truth, that will make them angry with me. So should I try or just stay quiet and see somebody destroy his life?!?
.
S-19 wrote: ↑Mon Dec 05, 2022 12:47 amNarcissistic abuse ruins lives. I propose that this is the real pandemic of modern times, blighting the lives of many millions.
As a result of Felix's thread on narcissism, you are now obsessed with "narcissism", calling people "narcissists" who aren't and dealing (or evading your problems!) with this supposed narcissism in a way that causes you harm. Going around in circles, numbing your brain.
That you've been hurt, doesn't mean that your ideas on narcissism, or your strategies to (not) deal with your problems are any good...
Nice Firestarter, you never fail to live up to your name, i'll give you that!! I don't think you're going to make any friends by basically telling people that they don't even know what they're talking about. As if their going to see some hard truth about themselves in the face of advice from a stranger in an overtly insulting manner. And what are you thinking man?? Labeling over 20 pages of peoples personal experiences as nothing more than 'rants'? I suppose you ought to look up the definition of the word.
"Now the only way to wake people up, is tell them the truth, that will make them angry with me. So should I try or just stay quiet and see somebody destroy his life?!?"
^^^
My answer is to STAY QUIET! Your current approach to telling people the 'truth' isn't going to result in waking anybody up, it's only going to create enemies genius. And that's coming from someone who is obviously not as adept in human psychology as yourself.
SeeD_Command wrote: ↑Mon Dec 05, 2022 7:51 pmMy answer is to STAY QUIET! Your current approach to telling people the 'truth' isn't going to result in waking anybody up, it's only going to create enemies genius. And that's coming from someone who is obviously not as adept in human psychology as yourself.
I think that this is actually good advice, although I hate to point out that you don't follow this advice yourself!
So I will just ignore the rants on "narcissism", by people who understand nothing about narcissism, and are just complaining, complaining and complaining, never learn, while fuelling their rants with the daily smoking of weed.
As for the smoking of weed...
Your posts these days seems almost rational, have you stopped posting while under the influence?!?
SeeD_Command wrote: ↑Mon Dec 05, 2022 7:51 pmMy answer is to STAY QUIET! Your current approach to telling people the 'truth' isn't going to result in waking anybody up, it's only going to create enemies genius. And that's coming from someone who is obviously not as adept in human psychology as yourself.
I think that this is actually good advice, although I hate to point out that you don't follow this advice yourself!
So I will just ignore the rants on "narcissism", by people who understand nothing about narcissism, and are just complaining, complaining and complaining, never learn, while fuelling their rants with the daily smoking of weed.
As for the smoking of weed...
Your posts these days seems almost rational, have you stopped posting while under the influence?!?
Hell no, i'm smoking weed and drinking beer right now while watching the shit-show we call a world my Dutch friend!
Your English is that good. 
